Pick your poison

Well, technically, I voted by mail

Yeah, I voted. I’m not sure why. Here in the Sunshine State, the big contest was between an inept current governor and an inept former one. After a month of dueling attack ads, both men pretty much reduced each other to the stature of small, evil clowns. The sad reality of election day in Florida is knowing that no matter how you vote, one of the candidates will win.

I suppose it’s like that in most states. Good leaders are never on the ballot. The people buying the ads prefer it that way.  The thing is, if you want to get in office and stay there, genuine beliefs are a terrible liability. You might as well text pictures of your privates to the first lady.

Bland obfuscation is the key. Don a hard hat and sit on a hay bale and pose with a shotgun, but for God’s sake don’t say or do anything that isn’t ambiguous unless you’re slandering your opponent. Because this is America and sooner or later everything comes back to bite you in the ass.

They say we’ve got a two-party system, but really it’s three: Republican, Democrat, and The Lesser of Two Evils. I’m solidly in the latter. It’s hard to choose sometimes, especially in Florida. But somebody’s got to do it.