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We’ll set a sixpack out for you

August 3, 2012 by Dave Knadler

The Chief Motel in Whitehall, Mont.

“Me Like Um.” That’s not offensive.

Here we have the Chief Motel in Whitehall, Mont. It is emblematic of just the sort of place well-heeled travelers like to avoid when they’re touring this great country.

I’m not sure why. As you can see, the Chief does not stint on amenities. You get your warm beds, your cold beer, your WiFi and your dish TV. Not to mention your ice machine, conveniently located right out by the highway next to your tasteful sign. Although if I had to guess, I’d say the ice machine is out of service at the moment.

I’ve never stayed at the Chief Motel. Whenever I’m near it I’m also pretty near family, where I can bunk for free. But I’m always tempted by places like this. I wonder about the cold beer: Is it complimentary, or does it come in a mini bar? Or do you get a voucher for the convenience store down the street?

Yeah, I’m being facetious. My guess would be, they’ll sell you a six of frosty Ice House when you check in. Even so, that’s not something you see at a Super 8.

When you consider all the callings in America that have become obsolete over the years, you think first of print journalist. But right after that comes independent motel owner. In the age of homogenized everything, nobody’s willing to risk a night’s sleep at a joint where they don’t ask you for your rewards card and the vacancy sign is missing a couple of letters.

I’m that way myself. This time of year in Montana, the Super 8s and LaQuintas and Hawthorne Suites will rob you blind, but you pay up because maybe they’ll ask the bikers next door to keep it down. Maybe they’re serious about the no-smoking rooms. And maybe you’re not sure you want to hike out to the highway to get your ice.

Right now though, I’m thinking of changing it up a little. I have a long drive back to Florida coming up in a couple of weeks. I think I’ll make it a point to avoid the chains, just as I’ve been avoiding the interstates. Mostly it’s curiosity. You still see mom-and-pop motels like the Chief along the back roads; how do they survive? Is it cheaper rates? If so, great. Is it by compromising on standards regarding cleanliness and clientele? If so, not so great. Maybe it’s just the memorable signage. We’ll see.

Anyway, the plan is to post a picture and mini-review of each stop along the way. Don’t worry: I won’t ask you to guess where they are. I may ask for money if I happen to get robbed.

More along these lines:

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  • Seven habits of highly effective parasitesSeven habits of highly effective parasites
  • Coulda been worse
  • jacksonville skyline from south bankParking, schmarking
  • For Petula, whenever I may find her

Filed Under: american life, Me, road trip

About Dave Knadler

Obscure writer. Lazy photographer. Bashful guitarist. Perhaps too fond of wine. Tireless nemesis of New York Times crosswords, Wordle, Semantle and all other puzzles du jour.

Comments

  1. Deb says

    August 3, 2012 at 8:46 am

    RE: Chief…..they did take the time to put some nice flowers in beneath the sign…or are they plastic??
    It sounds like an interesting journey back so take lots of pictures—-I don’t want to miss a single amenity!

    • Dave Knadler says

      August 3, 2012 at 9:30 am

      I believe the flowers are real. So, a point in favor!

  2. Joan says

    August 3, 2012 at 8:49 am

    My in-laws operated a mom-and-pop motel in the Florida panhandle over three decades ago. They got by with sheer, grinding hard work. “Mom,” with a bit of part-time help was the housekeeping staff. “Pop” was the maintenance crew, and, occasionally, security. One of them had to be available at the desk and reachable by the clientele 24/7. Between them, they managed the buildings, grounds, and the pool. Easy? Not very! You might find it interesting to interview the “moms and pops” who operate those non-chain motels on those blue highways. I know I’d be interested in hearing their stories.

    • Dave Knadler says

      August 3, 2012 at 9:31 am

      I can’t imagine a tougher job than running a motel. People can be such swine.

  3. John H. says

    August 3, 2012 at 9:30 am

    I don’t think the Bates Motel is on your route, so you should be Ok.

    • Dave Knadler says

      August 3, 2012 at 9:32 am

      There is a Bates Motel in Coeur d’Alene, Idaho. Never learned whether it was supposed to be a joke.

  4. Paula says

    August 3, 2012 at 9:40 am

    I’m of an age to remember when most motel signs seen on vacation looked something like that. Thanks for the nostalgia.

  5. Erin says

    August 4, 2012 at 12:12 am

    I think this will be interesting and possibly entertaining. Hopefully not too exciting. It makes me nervous though. You better be careful. I don’t want you showing up on one of my true crime shows.
    A bit of advice another blog had about this is to see the room before you pay for it.
    I think I remember seeing a motel in NW Iowa that had a Tee Pee out front. I recall also a kneeling or standing Indian princess. I am not sure if there were at the same location.
    Oh, lordy me! I am rambling! Ha!

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