Beauty is as beauty does

Alittle quiz: Who do you think would be a better dinner companion: Samantha Brick or Rachel Dratch? This is for women as well as men.

Personally, I think I’d go with Rachel. I know she’s not stunningly beautiful, like Brick, but I have this theory: People who are good-looking tend to lean heavily on those looks; people who are not so good-looking are forced to develop personalities. In my experience, people who look like Rachel Dratch are a lot more fun to be around than people who look like Samantha Brick. So, Rachel: Zaxby’s at 8?

Like everyone else in the past couple of weeks, I have an opinion on Brick. First, I think we can all agree she’s a little less stunning than she imagines. Second, any antipathy she detects in the workplace is probably a reflection of her own personality, as opposed to ugly coworkers envying her supposed radiance. I know it’s not professional jealousy, since other stuff she’s written recently reveals a style that’s aggressively and invariably vapid — exactly the sort of work you’d expect from someone whose only muse is her mirror.

The problem with getting by on good looks is that many of life’s important lessons tend to sail right over your head. Chief among them: People don’t like jerks, no matter what they look like. It’s important to be nice even to homely people who can’t advance your career. Yes, the hint of sexual availability can be used to manipulate most men, but it’s not something upon which to build a portfolio.

Or, I don’t know, maybe it is. For now, Samantha Brick is more famous than Rachel Dratch, her two weeks in a teapot tempest overshadowing Dratch’s seven years as a comic on SNL. I’d like to think it’s the Celebrity Apprentice sort of fame that will one day soon loop around to smack Brick on the back of her airy head. But these days you never know.

It’s not really necessary to debate Brick’s beauty, or the lack of it. Or to curse her for a self-regard that’s comically misguided. We’re really talking about how outrageous statements almost always overshadow wise ones, and make stars of the stupid. It’s starting to seem like a trend.