Jolie-Pitt twins resemble neither parent

Here are the photos of Angelina Jolie’s new twins. I could have sold them for millions, but money means nothing to me and information should be free. That’s Billy Bob at the upper left, Jennifer at bottom right. I know, it’s been reported elsewhere that the babies were named Knox Leon and Vivienne Marcheline, but Mr. and Mrs. Jolie are not idiots and they only put that out there so they’d know who the mole was. I guarantee you that as we speak, some staffer at Nice Matin is having his chestnuts roasted over an open fire.

And look: if you were doing a search using the terms “Jolie Pitt twins and their stupid names” don’t blame me if it brought you to this blog. I can use the hits, sure, but the last thing I want to do is waste your precious time when you’re mining the Web for the latest celebrity news. For the record, the only star I care about is Chuck Connors. And I’m pretty sure he’s dead.