If you even need to craft some do-it-yourself body armor, you might try Florida pumpkins. Theresa went through our entire set of cutlery trying to carve this bad boy. For some reason, these freaking gourds are nearly invulnerable. Probably has something to do with the insect population down here.
I was about ready to deploy my oscillating saw, but she persevered and finally got the top off without injury. It has eyes and a mouth, too, but they’re somewhat less expressive than we’d hoped. We’d probably have had better luck with a chunk of granite.